Re: zero

I think it is time to pick myself up and gain the confidence i wished to have. Time to stop hating yourself for the mistakes you had done, stop self-pitying yourself. There are beautiful days ahead. Be strong. It is fine if you make mistakes. Remember why you are doing this in the first place. Be happy and live strong.

If you noticed, the title is from an anime call re: zero (Obviously lol). In the beginning, i thought it is the typical plot of falling into a fantasy world. But as i continue watching the show, it has so much deep meanings to it. How Subaru (main character) fall into despair because he realised he is powerless and helpless and how he finally comes to terms with himself with the help of other characters. The character development is superb and all characters have their own ideals ¬†and depths. It’s not much of a love story (yet) but it plays with my emotions. It breaks my heart one moment and then heals and touches me in the next. If even Subaru is trying his best to to live the way he wants to, i see no reason why i should not.

 

subaru-and-rem-wallpaper-hd

Subaru¬†Natsuki: It was rough. It was so painful. I was so scared. I was so sad. It hurt so much, I thought I’d die. I tried so hard… I tired so hard! I was so desperate, so desperate to make everything right! It’s the truth. I’ve honestly never tried so hard at anything in my life! Because I loved this place… Because it was so important to me! I was so desperate to get back. I was scared… I was so scared! I didn’t want those eyes looking at me like that again… And I hated myself so much for feeling that way!

Rem: When you said that you hate yourself, it made me want to tell you all the wonderful things I know about you.

 

It’s time for me to start again.. from zero.

Re: zero

Appreciate

I realised that most of the time I’m always whining about my life and never actually stopped to appreciate all the good things that happened in my life. When i thought about appreciation, the first thing that came to my mind is my dad. I figured that my dad is one of the few people in the world who appreciates everything he has in his lifetime. He once told me, ” if you have got food on your table everyday, you are luckier that half of the people on earth; if you have a roof above your head, you are luckier than most people on earth; on top of that if you are healthy and have a chance to get education, you are one of the few luckiest person on earth.”

I believe that sometimes we got so caught up in our problems that we forgot that there is also beauty in our life. I quote Lelouch (from Code Geass, it’s an anime btw):

 

“Happiness is like glass. It may be all around you, yet be invisible.
But if you change your angle of viewing a little, then it will reflect light more beautifully than any other object around you”

 

and even if i don’t really agree with some of Lelouch’s action throughout the show, i always think that this quote is pretty accurate and true. And to me, it was one of the highlight of the show.

The reason why I’m writing this post is because i’m feeling pretty troubled today about some problems. Then, because Happy Fathers’ Day just passed not long ago, i thought about my dad and all the things he always talk to me about.

I don’t think that I’m lucky most of the time. But every time i think about how i have such a great dad, my perspective of life always change for the better. Although this might sound cheesy, my dad is one of the best things in my life and one that i appreciate the most.

Why? You might ask. Well, one of the reason is people from my friends, family members and even one of my teacher during high school has always said i look emotionless and that they can’t guess what i’m thinking and because of that, i think i might have freaked them out a little. However, my dad always realise it when something is wrong with me, either if I’m sad or angry. Although i don’t show it, he will always realise it and ask me what is wrong and it makes me feel really better to talk it out with him. It’s one of the things i missed the most when i moved out of home.

Oh great, I’m getting emotional again. Well then, i’ll stop writing here. And yeah, although i don’t say it, i love you dad!

Appreciate